grace in unusual places

this morning i was running late despite my best efforts which included packing my lunch and laying out my clothes last night.

my morning routine consists of waking up, turning the ceiling fan on in the kitchen (so the steam from my shower doesn't set off the fire alarm-becuase it does), jumping in the shower, getting dressed, doing my hair, and running out of the house, all of this has to be done before 7:01 in the morning. any later than that and i miss the bus. luckily, my route has a safety-net built into it, so if i miss the first stop 1.5 blocks from my house, i can run 4.5 blocks to the another stop in time to catch the bus there by 7:10.

since my hair cut, i 've missed the first stop 3 or 4 times. so anyway, this morning as i stepped onto my driveway from my porch i saw the bus pass the stop. my heart sank. and then out of nowhere the bus driver pulled over and stopped right in front of my house and let me on the bus.

this is a huge deal becuase just weeks earlier this same bus driver yelled at me for flagging him down in between stops when I almost missed him at the 2nd stop - i was desparate, which still does not excuse my behavior, i should just be on time...but we all have our days right?!?!

i've found myself thinking about all of the grace that happens on the bus or at Eugene Station, and if you knew the place, you would know that it might be the last place on earth where you would find grace.

last week on a very crowded bus a teenage guy gave up his seat to an elderly woman without even being asked.

the week before that a guy got on the bus but couldn't afford the fare, so the man that sits behind me everyday paid for the guy's day pass - an even $3.00.

at Eugene Station a woman comes around every morning and collects all of the empty cans and bottles out of the trashcans and turns them in for the deposit - her only income, 5 cents a piece - and the store owners at the station allow her to trade in more than the daily limit, knowing if they turn her away she may not eat that day.

so, for a place i rarely go after dark, there is an unusual amount of grace to be found.

things i've seen and lessons i've learned since i moved to oregon

Things I’ve Seen:

• a girl walking topless around town
•  a cop shot a raccoon in the head and then waited for the body to stop flailing long enough to pick it up and dispose of it
• a guy on a bike got hit by a car in the middle of the street and then got up and walked away
• homeless people making a good living by collecting all of the discarded cans and plastic bottles in trashcans around town, but mostly at the bus station
• children climbing 5.8/5.9 runs on skinners butte without breaking a sweat
• snakes in my front yard, deer next door

Lessons I’ve learned:

• it is legal in lane county for women to be topless, as to not discriminate against them since men can go shirtless
• if you hit a raccoon with your car on a busy morning, don’t pull over and wait around for help to come or you will witness a brutal yet merciful killing
• always where your helmet and look both ways when on your bike on the street, and always drive prepared to dodge bikers
• if budget cuts get REAL bad, plan B includes a lucrative can and bottle collection agency
• mentally prepare yourself to handle defeat and embarrassment at the hand of children when climbing
• watch your step
• business casual in Eugene means jeans with no holes and no flip flops
• there are more stray cats in Eugene than there are people in the state of Montana.
• if there is any kind of Fair or Faire going on proceed EVERYWHERE with caution, because there is no telling what you may see or smell

Moral of the story: life in Eugene is like a box of chocolates….

And I love it here.

 

i'm sorry blog

dear blog,

i miss you. i have two posts in draft form, but haven't seemed to get them finished. i'm sorry. but, i can't take all the blame--you were down yesterday.

.b

transitions

so, expect a number of posts this week chronicling my move up to Eugene, the awesome road trip i went on with Stuth, and general reflections on life. 

this post however, is about the craziest thing i've seen in a long time, and my first real reality check that I A. no longer live in louisiana, B. no longer live in a "red" state and C. Eugene is awesome and full of crazies. 

on my way home from a walmart/rei/target adventure I was driving up my street and was looking around, trying to get my bearings and generally just taking in the scenery. then I happened to take in some scenery that i did NOT want to see. there was a group of 3 people, two boys and a girl, and two of the three people had their shirts off. AND IT WASN'T THE TWO BOYS. There she was, a 20 something girl in jorts and NO SHIRT. she wasn't wearing a bra either. seriously?!?!?! a half naked girl on the sidewalk chillin' with her posse, shirtless. 

friends don't let friends walk topless. 

welcome to Eugene! 

movin' on up....

That's right. I finally got my big break. I'm moving to Oregon, Eugene to be exact. Go Ducks! I promise a real post soon, but as you can imagine, I have a lot of work to do!

boo beedo bee bop, boo boo beedo bee bop

if you know me at all (i think may be one of my favorite ways to begin a blog post), then you know that i am obsessed with grey's anatomy. unknowingly, i missed last week's new episode because i was with the NSU Women's Basketball Team in Katy, Texas at the Southland Conference Championships. i was so busy watching games, cheering on my girls, and exploring the Houston/Katy area that i actually forgot about greys. not only do i find this deeply saddening, but also completely out of character.

cut to tuesday night this week. i am watching the fat show (as my mom and i so lovingly call "The Biggest Loser") and crying which is totally me, which i willingly admit, and thought to myself, "isn't that veird, greys has been repeats the last couple of weeks....OR HAVE THEY?!?!?!?!" so, i ran in to my sweet computer and hopped on ABC.com only to realize that i had in fact missed a NEW episode of this outstanding season. i was devastated. thankfully, i had about an hour before I needed to go to bed, and praise Jesus that ABC posts full length episodes online so people like me don't have to just be out of luck and have to wait for a rerun. SO, i watched it and boy was it an episode. whew! intense, like camping. i love this freaking show. I don't know what it is about it, well, maybe it is partly because it takes place in the city i love (so much so, that facebook quizzes tell me i should live there), or maybe because the writing is so freaking good, or that i am in love with George, even though sometimes he makes poor decisions and ends up with STDs. I just plain love the show, more than any show i have ever loved before. it's an addiction, really. and the first step is admitting that i have a problem.

i hit an all-time low today and took the "how much do you know about dirty dancing" quiz on facebook, and then while reading the preview of tonight's new greys episode, i came across the "which greys character are you" quiz...and i took that too. Turns out, I know a lot about Dirty Dancing and I am most like....

Cristina:
Very few people have, or can understand, the sheer determination and drive that propels you, but you're just as fiercely protective of your friends as you are of your own hopes and dreams. If they're smart, your friends already know that. They also know that you're more vulnerable than you seem and are only glad to offer a shoulder to cry on.

So, you see, I do have a problem. Also, i have been known to spend so much money you'd blush if i told you how much, on songs that have been played on the show. Secretly, well, i guess not so secretly now, I've always dreamed of being the person that got to pick out the music that plays on shows, or in movies. I don't necessarily want to write it, i just want to put it all together. I suppose that if i could marry Jack Black's character in "The Holiday", we would be the Hollywood powerhouse music couple, forget about Beyonce and J-Z. hahaha. see my life isn't fun enough on its own, so i spend my down time pretending to be married to movie characters, not even real people, like actors, but the characters they play.

alas, i should go. i have a hot date with my futon, cat annie, a big bowl of special k, and the ol' boob tube tonight that i need to get ready for!

i'm a loser baby.................

smelly kid in class...

good afternoon! warning: this post may or may not contain personal and somewhat embarrassing information about me. some people may also classify this information as "too much". you have been warned.

basically, it comes down to this. i am the smelly kid in class.

i have decided that among other things, Louisiana is hot. my office, among other things, is hot. all it takes is a little bit of sunshine and my office turns into an easy bake oven. this is only made worse by the fact that my office does not have proper heating and cooling mechanisms, and by proper, i mean none at all. i'm pretty sure my office used to be a closet, all though, they couldn't even advertise it as temperature controlled.

thus, i smell. i have tried a virtual cornucopia of deodorants, and still haven't found one of any worth. so, i am calling out to you, my readers, friends, and non-smelly people, please suggest some high quality "deo-for-my-bo". i'm begging you. and so are my students...although it is likely that they think it is themselves becuase sometimes it is, and sometimes it is BAD. i'd like to think that i can only smell my self, and that i'm not torturing the the senses of the kids, but i'd be naive to believe that as truth.

i will chronicle the findings of this search so that other smelly kids may find hope in my story.

What hasn't Worked:
Secret Invisible Solid
Secret Flawless Invisible Solid
Mitchum for Women
Degree Clinical Strength (this is the current mistake, and may possibly be one of the worst)

so, this is the most recent excitement in my life. oh, and I had hand surgery, it is trying to heal now...but it is in a bad place (my thumb-pit)... surgery went well though, and i got to miss 4 days of work! woo hoo for NCIS marathons and blockbuster gift cards!!!!

why this road

where my heart is...

ginny owens - i know

a million miles away from anything familiar
a thousand places i would rather be
so I choke back the tears and try to find the bright side
though I find it hard to see beyond my suffering
in my heart I know your plan is so much bigger
but this small part is all that I can see
and I beleive you havn't left me here to wander
still I can't help but ponder where you're leading me

and I ask why this road
why this way and this load
tell me how far must I go til I see
...til I know why this road

a million miles away from anything familiar
what was it like to be so far from home
though you came in love
the world misunderstood you
there must have been some days when you felt so alone
but you endured, 'cause there was joy before you
joy that came because you sacrificed
since you gave yourself just to spend forever with me
surely I can trust you'll lead me through my darkest times

when I ask why....
why this road
why this way and this load
tell me how far must I go til I see
...til I know why

from here I cannot see
why you'd choose this path for me
but I don't have to understand to beleive
that you know why,
you know why this road
why this way and this load
you know how far I must go 'til I see
...'til I know why this road

My Louisiana Life

i have never in my life experienced drivers as terrible as the drivers in Louisiana. i watched someone almost die this morning on my way to work. I'll chronicle the events below:

First it is important to get the logistics-

My daily commute is about 1.5 miles, which usually takes about 8-10 minutes to drive. The town in which i live is separated into two sides by the very long (33 miles to be exact), Cane River Lake and there are only three places where this river-lake can be crossed. One of which is the third turn of the 5 it takes for me to get to work. There are three stop lights on the route. Allow me to map it for you:

it is important to note that the river-lake is not to scale on the map, i assure you.

ah yes, back to the near-death situation i was chronicling:

i was sitting at the intersection from hell (as noted on the map). stella and i were the second car in the line and while watching and waiting for my light to turn green i watch the cross-traffic. watching the cross-traffic has become a source of entertainment and extreme anxiety for me since moving to Louisiana because Louisianians tend to treat red lights as mere suggestions and constantly blow through them. this morning was no different.

so here i am watching, our light turns green and i do my usual OCD paranoid look right, look left, and right again before proceeding and praise God i did and praise God the woman in front of me did because some D-Bag in a huge pick-up truck comes hauling ace up the street (had she not looked both ways before crossing she would have been obliterated).

the next part however, is what prompted this rant.

as the guy is blowing through the red light, rather than watching where he is going, he looks at the woman in front of me and shoots her this grin. the only way to explain it is to picture Larry the Cable Guy smirking in sort of that jerk way...perhaps an illustration is necessary...

I'd imagine the thought going through his mind was, "Huh huh, i totally just smoked you through that light, huh huh, i am so cool. huh huh."

Moral of the story this guy wins the d-bag of the day award.

People in this state amaze me. I heard Governor Bobby Jindal speak on campus a couple months back and in the question and answer portion of his address a guy in the audience asked an extremely valid question. It was," Why is car insurance in Louisiana almost twice that of the average cost of car insurance everywhere else in the US?"

Governor Jindal's answer was this (well not quoted exactly, but you'll get the gist): "Sir, that is an excellent question, and i wish i had a better answer, but the truth is that 50% of the drivers in Louisiana are uninsured, and someone has to pay for their accidents."

You have got to be kidding me, right? So when these idiots run a red light and t-bone you going 40mph in a 25mph zone, you get to pay for his car and yours.

his car

your car

i hope you have enjoyed this glimpse into my Louisiana life.

where did december go?

well, I officially missed decemmber as well. i started a post about my job one night while I was watching study hall back in early december, but i ran out of time, and haven't found much since.

so, the jist of what i do at NSU is help keep the student-athletes eligible (i work with all of the "at-risk" students who are all basically academically unprepared for college), make schedules, teach study skills, figure grades, talk to coaches, talk to professors, and keep the kids in line, and then in all of my free time on the side i'm a psychologist, social worker, tutor, mother, cleaning lady and friend.

I have never been so tired in my life. i am learning a lot, being surprised a lot, seeing things i've never seen before, and working harder than I've ever worked before.

i have virtually no social life for a number of reasons, and at this point that is okay becuase I fill all hours i'm not working with sleep, and watching greys. duh.

i miss and love my friends A LOT. so likely, if you are reading this, you are one of the people i miss and love a lot, and know that I think about you often even if I have been TERRIBLE at staying in touch.

back to work.